had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize