Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Randomize
