we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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