We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
