Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
