i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
