I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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