Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize