There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize