Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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