do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
My bed smells like the plague
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
