I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
being pregnant is like rehab
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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