I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
