Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
