so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
