her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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