No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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