awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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