They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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