chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
