I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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