Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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