Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize