so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
she told me i tasted like america
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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