I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
kristin has been a bad kristin
it hurts more in the daytime
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
