Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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