I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize