I bet he comes in French.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
