Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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