I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
This couple is walking their pig around campus
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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