The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize