what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize