remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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