I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
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