We won't sleep together?
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
he thought i was a dude.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
