Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I think your dad took our porno
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
