so explain again why im purple
no
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
