i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Randomize
