I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
