Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
