i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Randomize
