So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
