I wish I could punch you in the face.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
whose ass print is on the piano?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize