And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
the gays at disneyland are vicious
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
