well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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