Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
