omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Randomize
