i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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