i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
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