The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
