i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
